Situation Hypothetical: (Insert Mission: Impossible theme tune here...) Ah - I see now! POssibly a better answer, then: Trying to get into a different social circle can be tricky: you are opening yourself up to rejection in theory, but there are things to bear in mind: - if you are trying to fit in with only One Thing (tm) on your agenda, yeah, it's most likely to fail in the long run if not the short. More friends is the aim you want there. (Not that I think you'd make that mistake - I'm stating the obvious!) - If you are looking for socialising and possible friends, rejection shouldn't be an issue - you'll either get along or not, but if you find a closing of ranks and that sort of teenage elitism going on, do you really want to know them? If that sort of thing seems to be happening, it's a reflection on them, not you. (Not sure if that makes sense outside of my head...)
If I could explain in writing how to get over it, I'd do so (and write a book and try to make £million or something... hell, I might even manage to get over it myself!), but yes: more important is that it's not an impossible situation. I guess my point underlying a lot of that is that a) you are not a hopeless lost cause - you're a long way from it! b) Sometimes the human brain comes up with some pretty far-fetched excuses for situations - assuming that you're the one who's "wrong" and "everything" is your problem doesn't help get through it.
(Again, excuse my bluntness - I don't do tact very well! And am supposed to be working....)
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2008-03-18 03:07 pm (UTC)Ah - I see now! POssibly a better answer, then:
Trying to get into a different social circle can be tricky: you are opening yourself up to rejection in theory, but there are things to bear in mind:
- if you are trying to fit in with only One Thing (tm) on your agenda, yeah, it's most likely to fail in the long run if not the short. More friends is the aim you want there. (Not that I think you'd make that mistake - I'm stating the obvious!)
- If you are looking for socialising and possible friends, rejection shouldn't be an issue - you'll either get along or not, but if you find a closing of ranks and that sort of teenage elitism going on, do you really want to know them? If that sort of thing seems to be happening, it's a reflection on them, not you. (Not sure if that makes sense outside of my head...)
If I could explain in writing how to get over it, I'd do so (and write a book and try to make £million or something... hell, I might even manage to get over it myself!), but yes: more important is that it's not an impossible situation. I guess my point underlying a lot of that is that a) you are not a hopeless lost cause - you're a long way from it! b) Sometimes the human brain comes up with some pretty far-fetched excuses for situations - assuming that you're the one who's "wrong" and "everything" is your problem doesn't help get through it.
(Again, excuse my bluntness - I don't do tact very well! And am supposed to be working....)